Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Academic Neuroscience Researcher jobs? · Latest report #sbq38x36
Your job has an expiration date
October 22, 2028
In 2 yearsYour abstract is just a prompt for a better generator now.
Turning clinical headaches into unreadable LaTeX papers
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Turning brains into binary assets
glub.youAI▸ NEUROSYNTH LOGIC ENGINE▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARSAI's Special Power
finds hidden patterns in junk data
You juggle clinical patient data and complex math models while writing endless grant proposals for tiny research budgets.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a messy dataset is actually lying to you before you start.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
AI takes over grant boilerplate and literature review summaries.
Month 5
Machine vision cleans your hospital data sets instantly.
Month 10
Neural solvers build your mathematical models while you sleep.
Month 15
Auto-submission agents handle the entire peer review cycle.
Year 2 · D-Day
The department board replaces your lab with a server.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98.6%
89 percent
Grant rejection rate
400 hours
Average hours per model
95 percent
Code repository rot
Your severance
One free subscription to a journal you hate
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