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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Altar Boy jobs? · Latest report #mdpjgnb6
Your job has an expiration date
September 22, 2028
In 1 year, 11 monthsA vestment-wearing prop whose main output is incense and awkward silence.
Professional candle-bearer and occasional robe-tripper.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Holier than thou, and twice as precise.
glub.youAI▸ RITUALBOT 3000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 11 MONTHSAI's Special Power
ignites the thurible with zero hand tremors
Assisting with liturgical rites, managing candles, carrying incense, and moving ceremonial books during religious services.
The one thing AI can't do
You are surprisingly good at navigating complex rituals without dropping the heavy brass candlestick.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 7
Automated flame-free LEDs replace manual lighting rituals.
Month 5
Syncing chimes to biometric triggers replaces manual bell ringing.
Month 10
Gantry systems begin handling heavy books and water cruets.
Month 16
Vision-guided nozzles disperse clouds with mathematical uniformity.
Year 1.9 · D-Day
The sanctuary is fully digitized and permanently autonomous.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 92%
12
Incense clouds per mass
4%
Clerical error rate
Maximal
Vestment starch level
Your severance
A one-way ticket to a silent, automated monastery.
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