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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Alternative Health Practitioner jobs? · Latest report #m7dqqxre
Your job has an expiration date
October 22, 2031
In 5 yearsDiagnosing energetic imbalances is just bad pattern recognition in a robe.
Professional listener to chronic vague discomforts and herbal enthusiast.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Pure data, zero placebo.
bzzt.youAI▸ VITALCHECK NODE 9▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 5 YEARSAI's Special Power
normalizes biomarkers through algorithmic suggestion
Conducts patient interviews to prescribe herbal tinctures, homeopathic remedies, and energetic alignment sessions based on subjective symptom reporting.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still hold a hand and pretend the outcome isn't just biology.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Wearables start tracking every physiological trend you ignore.
Month 12
AI models correlate your vague aches with actual medical research.
Year 2
Automated kiosks replace the need for physical herbal mixing.
Year 3.3
Evidence-based dashboards lower patient trust in intuitive diagnostics.
Year 5 · D-Day
The logic gate closes on the practice forever.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96%
42 percent
Placebo efficacy rate
60 minutes
Average consultation length
Zero seconds
Wait time for audit
Your severance
A lifetime supply of empty glass dropper bottles.
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