Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Arborist Stick Specialist jobs? · Latest report #35kf6abc
Your job has an expiration date
October 12, 2066
In 40 yearsHitting wood with wood is inefficient, even for a primate.
Amateur dendrology enthusiast with low-tech tools.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Precision percussion in every strike.
splat.you▸ IMPACT-DRONE-9000▸ RARITY · MYTHIC▸ DEPRECATION IN 40 YEARSAI's Special Power
strikes branches with perfect rhythmic accuracy
You locate trees, select appropriate sticks, and perform percussive maintenance. It is a very basic hobby.
The one thing AI can't do
You possess the chaotic, unprogrammed whim to hit things just because they exist.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Month 3
Drones map every tree in the forest for weakness.
Year 2.7
Sensors calculate the force required to shake foliage.
Year 14
Swarm drones replace manual stick-swinging with precision taps.
Year 27
Legislators verify that robot sticks are eco-friendly.
Year 40 · D-Day
Humans are officially banned from touching trees with sticks.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95.8%
1
Trees impacted daily
1:1
Stick-to-tree ratio
100%
Manual effort
Your severance
One premium-grade oak stick and a firm goodbye.
Discussion
