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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Astroparticle Physicist jobs? · Latest report #d8cvxaw6
Your job has an expiration date
May 19, 2029
In 2 years, 7 monthsYour expensive particle hunts are just pattern-matching with better marketing.
Searching for particles that probably don't want to be found.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Discovering dark matter without the PhD debt.
squeeze.you▸ COSMOSCOPE AI V9▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARS, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
filters background noise with perfect accuracy
Analyzing detector data for elusive signals and maintaining complex cryo-cooled experimental hardware.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a sensor is lying through its calibration curve better than software.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
AI starts monitoring detector logs to identify known hardware error patterns.
Month 5
Sensors and feedback loops manage coolant levels without human temperature checks.
Month 13
Machine learning models outperform human physicists at classifying particle event signals.
Year 1.9
Autonomous agents generate funding reports that actually get approved every time.
Year 2.6 · D-Day
The lab runs perfectly while you reflect on your lost relevance.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.5%
24 cups
Coffee consumed per paper
12 percent
Grant proposal success rate
40 hours/week
Time spent fixing cryo-leaks
Your severance
One free lifetime subscription to a cloud compute cluster.
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