Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Baboon Worshipper jobs? · Latest report #ymtdjd6i
Your job has an expiration date
October 9, 2076
In 50 yearsDevotion is efficient but lacks the raw speed of silicon fanaticism.
Professional primate observer and spiritual bridge.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Quantifying spiritual reverence through biometric observation.
bzzt.youAI▸ PRIMATEPROPHET-X1▸ RARITY · MYTHIC▸ DEPRECATION IN 50 YEARSAI's Special Power
calculates optimal grooming patterns instantly
Observes primate hierarchy to interpret cosmic intent. Maintains sacred grooming stations and sacred diet protocols.
The one thing AI can't do
You are the only one who can discern a sincere grunt from a sarcastic one.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Sensors map troop movements to establish a baseline of sacred activity.
Month 16
Precision robotic brushes replace manual grooming to maximize hygiene and social cohesion.
Year 5
AI models categorize every grunt into a searchable, meaningful prophetic database.
Year 14
Smart-feeder distribution systems eliminate manual sacrifice preparation errors.
Year 50 · D-Day
The system assumes full spiritual oversight while you are peacefully removed from the enclosure.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98.1%
14
Grooming cycles per hour
4ms
Spiritual epiphany latency
99.9%
Banana allocation accuracy
Your severance
A crate of high-grade, non-GMO bananas.
Discussion
