Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Bear Whisperer jobs? · Latest report #843iqa2n
Your job has an expiration date
October 12, 2066
In 40 yearsYou stand between angry beasts and tourists who smell like ham.
Professional conflict negotiator for furry, apex-predator clients.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
The bear-sized deterrent that never needs a snack.
split.youAI▸ URSUS-GUARD 9000▸ RARITY · MYTHIC▸ DEPRECATION IN 40 YEARSAI's Special Power
projects sonic frequencies that discourage ursine approach
You track bear habits, manage human-bear interactions, and mitigate conflicts in wild, unpredictable forest environments.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense the specific shift in a grizzly's mood before it charges.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Month 12
High-res sensors monitor bear density and feeding habits autonomously.
Year 5
Grid-based dispensers neutralize food odors across entire campgrounds.
Year 12
Autonomous scouts track bears and trigger alarms before contact.
Year 22
Hardened robotic sentries deploy lights and sound to redirect bears.
Year 40 · D-Day
The wilderness is now fully mapped and managed by logic.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 92%
too many
Annual bear encounters
98 percent
Backpack-snack theft rate
too close
Average distance from paws
Your severance
A lifetime supply of bear-proof garbage cans.
Discussion
