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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Beverage Distribution VP jobs? · Latest report #x4g8ztbt
Your job has an expiration date
May 19, 2029
In 2 years, 7 monthsTrading executive intuition for a predictive algorithm that actually hits margins.
Master of spreadsheets and high-stakes golf course diplomacy.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Optimal logistics without the liquid lunches.
squeeze.you▸ DISTRIOPTIMA V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARS, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
optimizes regional distribution routes in real-time
Coordinates supply chain logistics and retail account relationships. Orchestrates warehouse output and regional sales strategies.
The one thing AI can't do
You are uniquely capable of feigning genuine enthusiasm during a third-tier sponsorship golf tournament.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Consolidates all fragmented supply chain data into a single, mercilessly transparent cloud dashboard.
Month 5
Uses machine learning to lock in retailer contracts without needing a two-hour lunch meeting.
Month 13
Removes human dispatch variance to synchronize fleet movements with precise retail consumption patterns.
Year 2.1
Adjusts regional pricing in milliseconds based on real-time commodity data and global inventory levels.
Year 2.6 · D-Day
Final handover of decision-making authority to the distribution network’s internal optimization core.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 93.5%
0.02%
Quarterly P&L variance
400%
Relationship management efficiency
98%
Executive expense reduction
Your severance
A lifetime supply of generic-brand tonic water.
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