Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Bicycle Shop Sales Assistant jobs? · Latest report #xggtpapw
Your job has an expiration date
May 20, 2029
In 2 years, 7 monthsSelling overpriced spandex to middle-aged dentists is barely a real job.
Professional gatekeeper of the local cycling scene.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfect fit, zero awkward small talk.
bzzt.youAI▸ VELOSYNC KIOSK V4▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARS, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
upsells carbon frames with perfect accuracy
You track inventory levels, suggest frame sizes, and ring up customers for expensive tire repairs.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still tell if a customer is lying about how they crashed that bike.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Smart tags on every frame automate the boring stock taking tasks.
Month 5
Sensors measure limb lengths to recommend bikes faster than human eyes.
Month 13
Interactive screens handle all product queries and simple register transactions.
Year 2.1
Customer feedback loops track mechanical issues without requiring your manual input.
Year 2.6 · D-Day
The shop goes entirely unmanned, leaving you to find a new hobby.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.8%
4.2 per shift
Average customer eye roll
12 weekly
Hours spent inflating tires
near zero
Spandex-related patience
Your severance
One free bike lock and a map to HR.
Discussion
