Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Bidet Tester jobs? · Latest report #vm9caqqx
Your job has an expiration date
October 21, 2028
In 2 yearsYour career is washing down the drain with every rinse.
Quality control specialist in the splash zone.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Optimal hygiene calibration for every demographic.
squeeze.youAI▸ HYGIENEPULSE-X1▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARSAI's Special Power
calibrates water jets with perfect precision
You assess water pressure, nozzle aim, and drying efficiency for bathroom hardware. We have better sensors for that.
The one thing AI can't do
You possess an intuitive understanding of comfort that no algorithm will ever feel.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
High-speed cameras begin tracking spray patterns better than eyes can.
Month 4
Software tunes the nozzle angle before you even sit down.
Month 10
Pressure sensors in the seat map user weight distribution automatically.
Month 16
Testing rigs link directly to the assembly line control units.
Year 2 · D-Day
The unit finishes its final test cycle and shuts you out.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.1%
120 daily
Average splashes observed
0.1 millimeters
Nozzle drift tolerance
high
Water pressure sensitivity
Your severance
A lifetime supply of premium toilet paper.
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