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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Birthday Clown jobs? · Latest report #tm6q6tke
Your job has an expiration date
October 22, 2028
In 2 yearsA sad face painted on a mask is still a sad face.
Professional purveyor of face paint and secondhand joy.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Maximum merriment, zero existential dread.
oof.youAI▸ JOLLY-BOT X1▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARSAI's Special Power
delivers terrifyingly perfect balloon poodles
You juggle objects, twist long balloons into animals, and perform scripted slapstick routines for easily entertained children.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a child is about to cry and adjust the routine instantly.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Sensors map balloon physics to prevent high-velocity latex popping.
Month 5
Projectors apply perfect, symmetrical face paint without the skin irritation.
Month 10
Robotic limbs execute falls with perfectly timed, non-injurious impact metrics.
Month 16
Cameras track child facial expressions to adjust humor intensity levels.
Year 2 · D-Day
The clown car is repurposed as a high-efficiency hardware delivery pod.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 92%
4000 monthly
Balloons twisted
12 percent
Child panic rate
100 annually
Pies to face
Your severance
A lifetime supply of squeaky red noses.
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