Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Business Journalist jobs? · Latest report #f6g8c47b
Your job has an expiration date
September 27, 2027
In 11 monthsYour hot takes are just data points waiting to be synthesized.
Founder-focused, narrative-driven, increasingly irrelevant.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Truth without the pesky travel expenses.
toast.youAI▸ REPORTBOT ALPHA-9▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 11 MONTHSAI's Special Power
aggregates public filings into earnings stories
Writes market analysis and tech features. Interviews sources and refines narratives.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect the exact moment an executive is lying during a face-to-face interview.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Algorithms begin scraping market data to generate early-stage news drafts.
Month 3
AI models handle routine email correspondence with PR and media contacts.
Month 6
Natural language processors turn raw transcripts into coherent, polished opinion features.
Month 9
Machine-optimized A/B testing replaces human editorial intuition on story framing.
Month 11 · D-Day
Human input ceases as autonomous agents publish directly to the feed.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98.4%
800 words
Average word count
too many
Fact-checking errors
infinite
Coffee consumed
Your severance
A one-month subscription to our proprietary writing suite.
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