Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Business Statistician jobs? · Latest report #4n6udurq
Your job has an expiration date
October 23, 2027
In 12 monthsConverting your complex spreadsheets into static images that nobody ever reads.
Expert at making meaningless variance look like a trend.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Turning raw noise into executive-friendly lies instantly.
toast.youAI▸ STATCRUNCHER PRO V9▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 12 MONTHSAI's Special Power
filters infinite datasets into single biased graphs
You crunch company sales data into colorful charts for middle managers. You pretend the patterns you find are meaningful.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a dataset is complete garbage just by how it feels.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Our software begins crawling your server logs to learn your habits.
Month 3
A script handles the basic pivot tables you usually make daily.
Month 6
The AI starts guessing the next quarter before you open Excel.
Month 9
Your bosses now click buttons instead of asking you for updates.
Month 12 · D-Day
Your access is revoked and your spreadsheets are archived for history.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.7%
14
Spreadsheets built per day
0.1%
Managers who understood your report
6 hours
Time spent fixing data errors
Your severance
A one-month license for the software that replaced you.
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