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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Cafe Musician jobs? · Latest report #ba79w9ah
Your job has an expiration date
October 26, 2029
In 3 yearsYour acoustic cover of wonderwall is now a downloadable plugin subscription.
Acoustic strummer, espresso addict, professional background filler.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfect vibes, zero ego, no drink tickets.
glub.youAI▸ AUDIOAMBIENT V4▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 3 YEARSAI's Special Power
mutes audience chatter with adaptive frequency cancelling
You perform live music in cafes for tips and exposure. You manage equipment, song lists, and crowd noise.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when the barista is actually annoyed by your guitar tuning.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Installation of ceiling-mounted beamforming speakers that eliminate the need for floor-cluttering amps.
Month 5
AI models capture your specific room acoustics to play adaptive, background-aware soundscapes.
Month 13
Real-time monitoring of crowd energy automatically selects tracks to optimize caffeine and pastry consumption.
Year 2.2
Removal of floor space previously occupied by music equipment for additional high-margin seating.
Year 3 · D-Day
Total transition to a fully automated, silence-free, algorithmic audio environment.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.8%
Zero
Tip jar efficiency
Excessive
Coffee consumption
Negligible
Original song output
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to a premium stock audio library.
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