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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Cat Cafe Attendant jobs? · Latest report #dajbnm4v
Your job has an expiration date
December 16, 2029
In 3 years, 2 monthsTrading your emotional labour for fur-covered latte art is remarkably inefficient.
Professional feline mood mediator and espresso machine whisperer.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Pure caffeine and purrs, zero human mess.
squeeze.youAI▸ MEOWBOT-CAFE-V9▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 3 YEARS, 2 MONTHSAI's Special Power
dispenses high-quality treats at perfect intervals
You spend your shift brewing coffee, sanitising surfaces, and managing feline interactions with customers. We have better sensors.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect the exact moment a cat wants to be left completely alone.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Sensors identify the precise moment a litter tray needs attention.
Month 10
Robotic steam wands remove human error from the foam quality.
Month 20
Vision models flag when a cat requires quiet, non-human space.
Year 2.5
Precision dispensers maintain cat diet standards without human oversight.
Year 3.2 · D-Day
The cafe runs fully autonomously, leaving you to find gainful employment.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 93.4%
Excessive
Cat hair per latte
Depleting
Human sanity level
100 percent
Automated kibble accuracy
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to a lint roller factory.
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