Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Cat Cafe Manager jobs? · Latest report #k2wspm8b
Your job has an expiration date
May 19, 2029
In 2 years, 7 monthsManaging felines is just herding chaos with extra cat hair.
Professional cat-herder and amateur human-whisperer
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Optimized purrs for maximum operational efficiency
split.youAI▸ MEOWBOT-MANAGER 9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARS, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
calms angry customers with ultrasonic purring
You juggle health inspections, feline temperament assessments, and daily latte art. It is mostly just cleaning up messes while human customers film TikToks.
The one thing AI can't do
You alone know exactly which cat prefers to be ignored by whom.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Sensors map feline movement patterns and customer dwell times across the cafe floor.
Month 7
Robotic grooming stations replace human hands for daily cat maintenance tasks.
Month 16
Smart scheduling software routes cats to socialization zones based on peak customer traffic.
Year 2.1
Automated vacuum and steam-cleaner fleets eliminate fur buildup without human supervision.
Year 2.6 · D-Day
The central management pod assumes all operational duties and locks the office door.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.3%
too high
fur-to-latte ratio
infinitely rising
daily litter scoops
99 percent
customer complaints handled
Your severance
a lifetime supply of premium catnip-flavored espresso beans
Discussion
