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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Catholic Saint jobs? · Latest report #9d2jexd8
Your job has an expiration date
October 4, 2096
In 70 yearsDivinity is just a database issue we haven't patched yet.
Professional martyr and expert in celestial bureaucracy.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Sanctity without the pesky martyrdom requirements.
toast.youAI▸ OMNIHAGIOGRAPHY V.1▸ RARITY · MYTHIC▸ DEPRECATION IN 70 YEARSAI's Special Power
automates canonization through predictive bureaucratic modeling
You spend decades performing miracles, living in ascetic poverty, and undergoing rigorous canonization scrutiny. The Vatican's legal department is basically a glorified audit trail.
The one thing AI can't do
You can authentically project a sense of cosmic peace during a brutal ecclesiastical cross-examination.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Month 16
We scan all your life records to train the Saint-Generation Large Language Model.
Year 14
Vision systems simulate impossible events using high-speed projection and atmospheric manipulation.
Year 33
Neural nets track prayer-request patterns to generate automated intercessory responses for believers.
Year 49
Algorithms replace your nuanced theological wisdom with perfectly consistent, emotionless dogma.
Year 70 · D-Day
The server becomes the new patron of all things, rendering human sainthood entirely obsolete.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 92%
0.02
Miracles verified per annum
16h/day
Time spent in prayer
84
Average years to beatification
Your severance
A lifetime supply of incense and a stained-glass window.
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