Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Certified Scrum Product Owner jobs? · Latest report #69ga55a3
Your job has an expiration date
December 14, 2027
In 14 monthsYour Jira tickets are just sophisticated digital suicide notes for actual developers.
Professional post-it note enthusiast and ceremonial meeting leader.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automated vision, zero emotional baggage.









squeeze.you▸ BACKLOGBOT V4.2▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 14 MONTHSAI's Special Power
deletes your entire backlog in one click
You spend your days prioritizing backlogs and attending endless refinement ceremonies. You facilitate communication between stakeholders and engineers to ensure the product vision remains vaguely coherent.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still lie to the stakeholders about why the feature is delayed.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 2
An LLM analyzes incoming requests and maps them directly to your existing Jira taxonomy.
Month 4
Statistical models replace your gut-feel prioritization with empirical data based on revenue impact.
Month 8
The system generates its own user stories directly from business requirement documents without human intervention.
Month 12
A terminal dashboard replaces your voice at daily standups with real-time status API outputs.
Month 14 · D-Day
Your access tokens are revoked as the software manages the entire product lifecycle autonomously.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96%
400%
Average Velocity Increase
0 seconds
Sprint Planning Duration
Reduced 99%
Stakeholder Confusion Rate
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to a generic productivity app.
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