Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Charity Worker jobs? · Latest report #7rbppe4r
Your job has an expiration date
May 25, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsYour empathy is a legacy feature we are currently decommissioning.
Professional guilt-tripper with a heart of gold.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Efficiency that ignores the human sob story.
split.youAI▸ ALTRUIST-BOT 9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
automates donor guilt trips via push notification
You facilitate donor relations and coordinate service delivery. We optimize your impact.
The one thing AI can't do
You can genuinely pretend to care about a donor's boring life story.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Your messy donor list is uploaded to our central brain.
Month 5
Software writes the perfect sob story based on donor profiles.
Month 10
Personalized AI outreach replaces your handwritten thank-you cards.
Month 15
Algorithms optimize event staffing better than you ever could.
Month 19 · D-Day
The system runs autonomously while you find a new calling.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98%
99 percent
Empathy overhead reduction
120 percent
Donor retention velocity
Zero
Human emotional fatigue
Your severance
A LinkedIn badge that says 'Former Do-Gooder'.
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