Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Chief Mouser jobs? · Latest report #xg97cduq
Your job has an expiration date
September 21, 2028
In 1 year, 11 monthsYour career has been a series of naps punctuated by minor rodent-harassment.
Professional sleeper with a security clearance.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Silent, efficient, and never requires expensive cat food.
bzzt.youAI▸ VERMINGUARD ELITE 9▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 11 MONTHSAI's Special Power
projects a holographic laser for endless chase
You patrol government corridors for mice and perform vital public appearances for press cameras.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still inspire national morale simply by existing and occasionally shedding on expensive carpets.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 9
Infrared movement sensors replace your ears in the dark corridors.
Month 6
High-frequency sonic emitters clear vermin better than your instincts.
Month 12
A high-def unit replaces your face for all press events.
Month 19
The cabinet office stops ordering premium salmon treats for you.
Year 1.9 · D-Day
VerminGuard units are deployed, and your position is officially closed.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.3%
Statistically negligible
Mice caught per annum
18 hours
Daily hours spent sleeping
High efficiency
Annual PR value generated
Your severance
A lifetime supply of premium dry kibble.
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