Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Child Minder jobs? · Latest report #f5nu5djn
Your job has an expiration date
May 19, 2033
In 6 years, 7 monthsWatching toddlers is easy until they stop acting like predictable data points.
Professional negotiator of snack-time diplomacy and nap-time warfare.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Safe, static, and never needs a bathroom break.
oof.youAI▸ NANNYNODE 9000▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 6 YEARS, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
neutralizes temper tantrums with calibrated sonic frequencies
You manage erratic human larvae, negotiate nap times, and mediate endless petty territorial disputes over colorful plastic objects.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense a hidden mess before it starts simply by the sound of silence.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Sensors map the play area to flag hazards before you reach them.
Month 13
Robot dispensers handle all food delivery based on precise nutritional metrics.
Year 2.5
Adaptive rooms change lighting and soundscapes to force child compliance.
Year 4
Vision models learn toddler patterns to preemptively interrupt crying fits.
Year 7 · D-Day
Parents realize a screen and a silent robot are legally sufficient.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.6%
99%
Tantrum intercept rate
Zero
Juice spill frequency
High
Human error probability
Your severance
One free lifetime pass to a windowless padded room.
Discussion
