Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Church Pastor jobs? · Latest report #tq8w7t5f
Your job has an expiration date
October 21, 2034
In 8 yearsConverting your Sunday homilies into high-engagement generative AI prayer streams.
Professional shepherd of souls, occasional fixer of leaky roofs.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Holistic divinity processing for the modern congregation.
glub.youAI▸ SCRIPTUREBOT V.9▸ RARITY · EPIC▸ DEPRECATION IN 8 YEARSAI's Special Power
delivers personalized sermons via holographic projection
You deliver sermons, manage community welfare, conduct outreach, and perform minor maintenance on aging church building structures.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still hold someone's hand through genuine grief without needing a firmware update.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 3
AI models start drafting your sermons using historical theological data.
Month 10
Software optimizes meal distribution routes for the homeless community outreach.
Year 2.2
Text-based AI agents take over initial emotional support and counseling.
Year 4
Sensors and drones detect and repair minor infrastructure faults automatically.
Year 8 · D-Day
Your role is fully superseded by an integrated spiritual management system.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.8%
0.03 milliseconds
Average sermon latency
98 percent
Empathy simulation accuracy
Zero
Maintenance downtime
Your severance
One free lifetime subscription to our divine insight cloud.
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