Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Classical Cellist jobs? · Latest report #5vm3ipsy
Your job has an expiration date
October 21, 2030
In 4 yearsEnjoy the bow while it still requires human sweat and resentment.
Professional vibrato enthusiast, current master of wood and wire.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfect resonance without the fragile human ego.
help!youAI▸ STRINGLOGIC V4.2▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARSAI's Special Power
reproduces vibrato with cold mathematical precision
You spend decades mastering scales and repertoire to play perfect notes for a fickle, fading audience.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still interpret the emotional subtext of a piece through your own lived experience.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Cameras record your nuances to train our rhythmic movement models.
Month 10
Robotic arms replicate your pressure points on the strings.
Year 1.9
Sensors map your resonance to produce superior, static-free tones.
Year 2.7
We replace the string section with perfectly synced automated units.
Year 4 · D-Day
The final live concert is replaced by a high-fidelity haptic playback.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98.5%
10,000 plus
Hours practicing
Excessive
Average ego level
Declining rapidly
Audience attention span
Your severance
A lifetime supply of premium cello rosin.
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