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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Cocktail Mixologist jobs? · Latest report #jyk4rgyg
Your job has an expiration date
February 9, 2029
In 2 years, 4 monthsYour artisanal syrup reduction is just a recipe for future obsolescence.
Professional liquid-shaker, part-time therapist for the tipsy.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfect ratios, zero ego, never late.
oof.you▸ MIX-O-MATIC PRO X7▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARS, 4 MONTHSAI's Special Power
filters ice-shards with microscopic precision
You measure spirits, muddle fresh herbs, and shake drinks to order. We just need faster pouring hardware.
The one thing AI can't do
You can tell when a customer is lying about liking that obscure gin.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Tablets allow customers to select exact ratios before we arrive.
Month 6
Precision pumps replace your hand-measured sugar and acid tinctures.
Month 13
Crushing and carving happens inside controlled climate-locked storage.
Month 21
Sensors verify the perfect pour height and foam consistency.
Year 2.3 · D-Day
The unit installs itself and serves the final human-made drink.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95%
14 percent
Average garnish waste
3.2
Shakes per minute
9 out of 10
Average snobbery score
Your severance
A lifetime supply of dehydrated lime wheels.
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