Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Coffee Roaster and Barista jobs? · Latest report #95g75m82
Your job has an expiration date
October 22, 2030
In 4 yearsYour latte art is just an expensive way to display milk entropy.
Coffee whisperer, grinder martyr, foam architect.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfect extraction without the personality complex.
sluurp.you▸ BREWMASTER INDUSTRIAL 9▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARSAI's Special Power
calibrates grind size for every atmospheric shift
You roast green beans to exact profiles and manually extract espresso shots for caffeine-starved customers.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still taste the subtle profile notes in a bean before the machine burns it.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Sensors measure bean moisture and ambient humidity in real time.
Month 10
Closed-loop systems take over roast profiling and drum heat control.
Year 1.9
Steam wands are replaced by high-pressure automated microfoam injectors.
Year 2.7
Vision-guided arms dose, tamp, and lock shots into the group.
Year 4 · D-Day
The counter is fully automated and you are permanently off-shift.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95%
12 percent
Average extraction error
45 per hour
Daily customer sighs
180 seconds
Seconds per latte
Your severance
A lifetime supply of lukewarm instant coffee granules.
Discussion
