Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Collections and Auctions Manager jobs? · Latest report #sutv9tde
Your job has an expiration date
June 28, 2029
In 2 years, 8 monthsSelling forgotten junk is easy, managing the physical debris is just tedious.
Professional curator of other people's abandoned life choices.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Turning abandoned units into revenue streams automatically.
stretchy.youAI▸ ASSETLIQUIDATOR-9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARS, 8 MONTHSAI's Special Power
auctions entire warehouses in ten seconds
You track storage unit delinquencies, catalogue abandoned inventory, and facilitate high-frequency auctions of unclaimed goods.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense if a pile of boxes actually contains something valuable or just trash.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Software automatically tags delinquent units for remote access monitoring.
Month 7
Mobile vision sensors map contents to generate accurate auction lots.
Month 15
Precision robotic arms remove locks without damaging external facility doors.
Year 1.9
An algorithmic engine runs continuous auctions for maximum recovery value.
Year 2.7 · D-Day
Human oversight of physical auctions is formally retired across all sites.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 93.1%
27 percent
Average unit claim
94 percent
Dust-to-item ratio
8 tons daily
Unclaimed junk volume
Your severance
A vintage toaster and a lifetime of storage fees.
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