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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace College Admissions Director jobs? · Latest report #kb9nvbnx
Your job has an expiration date
October 21, 2028
In 2 yearsYour career is just a sorting algorithm that needs a software update.
Gatekeeper of prestigious envelopes and dreams of ivy.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Sorting humans by data points since last Tuesday.
shred.you▸ ENROLLMENTOPTIMIZER 9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARSAI's Special Power
filters 50000 applications while you sleep
You review thousands of applications to curate a freshman class. You balance enrollment goals with institutional prestige.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a student is lying about their extracurricular passion in a personal essay.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
AI begins parsing every single student application for predictive signals.
Month 4
The system assigns numerical value to extracurriculars and personal essays.
Month 10
Probability models determine who actually signs the enrollment contract.
Month 16
Algorithms simulate your committee debates with perfect objective consistency.
Year 2 · D-Day
Human input becomes a liability rather than a decision-making asset.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96%
2000 files/sec
Average reading speed
too high
Human bias variance
99.9 percent
Legacy student rejection
Your severance
a commemorative branded sweatshirt and an auto-reply email
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