Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace College Admissions Recruiter jobs? · Latest report #udefdkez
Your job has an expiration date
April 15, 2028
In 1 year, 6 monthsYou represent the university, but soon you will represent absolutely nothing.
Professional stalker of high-achieving teenagers.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Closing the application gap through pure math.
sluurp.you▸ ENROLLMENTBOT V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 6 MONTHSAI's Special Power
sends personalized rejection letters instantly
You chase teenagers through high school hallways to sell them an expensive degree they might not actually need.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still read the genuine anxiety in a student's eyes before they sign.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
We scrape every high school contact list in the country.
Month 4
Smart bots replace your generic emails with hyper-targeted lies.
Month 10
High-fidelity VR replaces the need for your campus walks.
Month 15
Software predicts enrollment probability better than your gut feeling.
Month 18 · D-Day
Your access to the student database is permanently revoked.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96%
4,200
High school cafeteria lunches consumed
94 percent
Cold-called students ghosted
too many
Broken promises of financial aid
Your severance
A branded hoodie and a handshake.
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