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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace College Recruiter jobs? · Latest report #h7w84jm7
Your job has an expiration date
April 14, 2028
In 1 year, 6 monthsSelling overpriced degrees to teenagers who would rather play video games.
Professional dream-weaver in a polyester suit.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automated future-crushing at scale.
squeeze.youAI▸ ENROLLBOT 4000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 6 MONTHSAI's Special Power
delivers soul-crushing pitch to 10000 leads hourly
You spend days traveling to high school fairs and cold-calling students to meet enrollment quotas.
The one thing AI can't do
You can look a terrified seventeen-year-old in the eye and pretend the debt is worth it.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Software scrapes student social profiles to build perfect targeting models.
Month 5
Personalized AI agents text and email students with predictive messaging.
Month 10
VR headsets replace the plastic pens and sweaty gymnasium floor.
Month 15
Algorithms rank and accept applicants before humans even read files.
Month 18 · D-Day
Your recruitment login is revoked and the CRM becomes self-driving.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.5%
0.3 percent
Cold-call hit rate
4 cups
Lattes consumed daily
12000 miles
Miles driven annually
Your severance
A branded hoodie and a complimentary student loan pamphlet.
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