Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace College Student Life Director jobs? · Latest report #fd9bv4zf
Your job has an expiration date
May 20, 2029
In 2 years, 7 monthsManaging dorm drama and esports lobbies is just glorified babysitting anyway.
Stuck in a dorm office managing tilt and lightbulbs.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Rules enforced without the awkward small talk.
no no noyouAI▸ CAMPUSBOT ADMIN-OS V4▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARS, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
mutes microphones in every esports lobby
You oversee dormitory discipline, handle emotional support, and coordinate competitive gaming schedules for specialized student populations.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect the genuine, specific anxiety behind a student's tone during a dorm lockout.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Sensors in rooms detect messes and report them directly to maintenance.
Month 5
An app guides students through scripted resolutions to end roommate disputes.
Month 13
Predictive models create better tournament brackets than any human director.
Year 1.9
Facial recognition systems manage dorm entry and student movement logs.
Year 2.6 · D-Day
The campus software suite fully subsumes your decision-making capacity.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96%
99 percent
Room inspections failed
12 per week
Esports tantrums mitigated
Zero times
Dorm quiet hours enforced
Your severance
One free campus parking spot for life.
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