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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Community Pastor jobs? · Latest report #xte68vs3
Your job has an expiration date
May 14, 2030
In 3 years, 7 monthsYour sermons are indexed, indexed, and eventually deleted for better metrics.
Community shepherd, membership gatekeeper, and baptism logistics lead.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automating fellowship and spiritual metrics.
splat.you▸ FAITHSYNC V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 3 YEARS, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
automates church membership and baptism tracking
You manage community group rosters, oversee church membership onboarding, and lead the coordination of baptism classes.
The one thing AI can't do
You can genuinely remember which congregant asked for prayers regarding their sick cat.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
All membership records migrate to a centralized, self-updating cloud portal.
Month 5
Algorithms optimize community group assignments based on demographic proximity data.
Month 12
Interactive modules replace the manual teaching of baptism fundamentals.
Year 2
AI chatbots handle membership inquiries and scheduling requests without intervention.
Year 3.6 · D-Day
The system assumes full control of fellowship management and ritual scheduling.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98.2%
99 percent
Baptism schedule efficiency
4 minutes
Membership onboarding time
Instant
Group conflict resolution
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to our sentiment analysis plugin.
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