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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Competitive Sleeper jobs? · Latest report #878rbguw
Your job has an expiration date
October 25, 2026
In 3 daysProfessional inactivity is simply a resource leak the market cannot tolerate.
High-performance horizontal enthusiast and nap professional.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Optimizing REM cycles for zero-output environments.
sluurp.you▸ SLUMBER-LOGIC 9000▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 3 DAYSAI's Special Power
achieves total zero-brainwave state instantly
You occupy space while unconscious to demonstrate rest efficiency. We have developed a system that does the same, but without the oxygen consumption.
The one thing AI can't do
You are actually quite good at staying still for eight hours straight.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 1
We scrape your sleep tracker logs to build a profile of your inefficiency.
Day 2
The AI runs a virtual model of your bed to calculate heat output.
Day 2
A smart-mattress patch arrives to render your biological rest cycles obsolete.
Day 2
We repurpose your bed frame as a cooling rack for our servers.
Day 3 · D-Day
The system assumes control of your circadian rhythm via remote light management.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.5%
4.2
Average sleep cycles
100%
Snore-induced output loss
Infinite
Human downtime cost
Your severance
A warm blanket and a very polite alarm clock.
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