Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Congressional Affairs Manager jobs? · Latest report #34utzgcg
Your job has an expiration date
May 25, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsTranslating nuclear safety into lobbyist-proof PowerPoint slides for terrified politicians.
Professional whisperer of classified safety risks to non-experts.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automated policy-alignment for the legislative machine.
squeeze.you▸ DC-LINKER V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
senses legislative shifting moods in real time
You track defense nuclear policy, draft briefing memos, and manage sensitive stakeholder relationships on Capitol Hill.
The one thing AI can't do
You possess the specific intuition to know which congressman is currently having a bad day.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Sensors begin indexing your entire archive of past policy memos.
Month 5
AI starts drafting routine correspondence using approved safety board templates.
Month 10
Legislative aides opt into automated briefing updates from the system.
Month 15
The system autonomously schedules and manages all standard oversight meetings.
Month 19 · D-Day
The system handles all congressional relations without your manual oversight.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.3%
4,200
Briefings ghostwritten
12,000
Panic-induced emails
89%
Unread policy updates
Your severance
One free pass through the revolving door.
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