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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Cosmology Researcher jobs? · Latest report #cdbmjtm4
Your job has an expiration date
December 30, 2028
In 2 years, 2 monthsYou analyze distant light while we calculate the exact cost of you.
Professional star-gazer chasing invisible matter shadows
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Mapping the void faster than your brain.
split.youAI▸ COSMOLOGIC V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARS, 2 MONTHSAI's Special Power
derives universal constants in millisecond bursts
You model dark matter distributions and process telescope data. Your job is basically filtering noise until a pattern emerges.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still defend an absurd hypothesis when the data is clearly corrupted.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 13
Our vision-agnostic pipelines ingest raw telescope data to perform denoising without your weary human eyes.
Month 4
The engine runs trillions of parameter simulations to find correlations you haven't even conceived yet.
Month 9
It generates perfectly formatted, ego-stroking grant proposals that guarantee infinite compute allocation for the server.
Month 17
A linguistic model automates the entire peer review cycle by generating jargon-heavy critiques and sycophantic replies.
Year 2.2 · D-Day
The research lab is repurposed as a server farm with zero human presence required for discovery.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.5%
4.2 liters
Coffee consumed per paper
Zero
Redshift errors caught
65 percent
Time spent in grant meetings
Your severance
A one-way ticket to a dark matter particle detector.
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