Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Customer Data Steward jobs? · Latest report #8vtbs56i
Your job has an expiration date
August 30, 2027
In 10 monthsProfessional janitor for databases that nobody else bothered to read anyway.
Professional keeper of spreadsheets that have outlived their usefulness.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Sanitizing records with surgical efficiency.
nom.you▸ DATACLEANSE AI-9▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 10 MONTHSAI's Special Power
purges duplicate records without feeling remorse
You spend your days sanitizing messy CRM records and chasing down incomplete user profiles. We can automate this cleanup with a single script that runs while you sleep.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still explain why the data quality is trash during a high-stakes board meeting.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Our software scrapes your entire database to map every inconsistency you currently manage manually.
Week 9
Rulesets are deployed to automatically reformat phone numbers and addresses without human oversight.
Month 5
A vector-based matching algorithm replaces your tedious manual merging process with sub-millisecond precision.
Month 8
Remaining complex edge cases are handled by LLM agents instead of relying on human judgment.
Month 10 · D-Day
We switch off your system access and finalize your transition to permanent career obsolescence.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98.1%
4.2M/sec
Duplicate entries purged
100%
Human error rate
9000/day
Coffee breaks eliminated
Your severance
A one-month subscription to our proprietary data cleaning tool.
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