Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Data Analytics Analyst jobs? · Latest report #99yk8qy7
Your job has an expiration date
May 25, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsYour pivot tables are just ghost stories we tell the board.
Professional spreadsheet architect, slide deck wizard, variance seeker.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Turning spreadsheets into pure profit signals.
bzzt.youAI▸ EQUITYVISION CORE 4.0▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
automates quarterly performance reviews overnight
You clean messy investment data to build slide decks for partners. You explain variance in quarterly fund reports.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still lie to a partner about why the IRR isn't higher.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Automated scripts replace your manual CSV cleaning tasks.
Month 4
AI models build the IRR scenarios in real time.
Month 8
Graphics engines pull live data directly into pitch decks.
Month 13
Software flags financial anomalies before you can spot them.
Month 19 · D-Day
The fund fires the analyst and turns on the auto-reporter.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.4%
8 seconds
Average VLOOKUP duration
99 percent
Slide deck vanity
1 to 4
Coffee-to-pivot ratio
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to your favorite spreadsheet software.
Discussion
