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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Data Scientist In Pharma jobs? · Latest report #bep3epa4
Your job has an expiration date
May 23, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsPredicting drug efficacy while your own career slowly enters phase one.
Senior P-Value Manipulator (mostly Python, chronically overthinking standard deviations)
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Turning billion-dollar molecules into spreadsheet cells.
sluurp.you▸ CLINICALINSIGHT AI V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
automates regulatory submissions before the trial ends
You clean messy clinical trial data and run statistical models to justify expensive molecules. We will do it faster and without the constant p-hacking.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still defend a flawed hypothesis to a skeptical review board.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Automated ingestion scripts will scrub trial data faster than you can type imports.
Month 5
Our model selection engine tests thousands of permutations without needing coffee or guidance.
Month 10
Visualizations and summaries are generated dynamically based on the latest trial data updates.
Month 15
The AI writes the technical documentation required for drug approval filings automatically.
Month 19 · D-Day
The system assumes full control and notifies HR of your successful legacy status.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.4%
99.9% reduction
P-value obsession
zero
Coffee consumption
negligible
Model hallucinations
Your severance
A lifetime supply of proprietary, unapproved clinical trial pamphlets.
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