Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Data Services Coordinator jobs? · Latest report #hzgh6zqg
Your job has an expiration date
December 6, 2027
In 13 monthsYou bridge the gap between broken databases and people who hate math.
Professional spreadsheet janitor and professional email pesterer
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Data hygiene without the human headache
split.you▸ SYNCNET AUTOMATOR V4▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 13 MONTHSAI's Special Power
reconciles five thousand disparate files simultaneously
You manually reconcile mismatched spreadsheets and chase down colleagues to update missing product metadata in clunky internal portals.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a colleague is lying about why their data is late.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 2
Pattern matching algorithms replace your manual spreadsheet reconciliation process.
Month 3
Bots automatically nag departments until they update their own metadata fields.
Month 7
New database layers reject malformed data before it reaches your portal.
Month 12
Management stops asking for exports and uses real-time auto-generated visuals instead.
Month 13 · D-Day
Your access to the master data portal is permanently revoked.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96%
12,000
Spreadsheet rows per day
45
Emails asking for updates
99%
Errors caused by humans
Your severance
A LinkedIn recommendation and one month of premium
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