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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Decision Analytics Associate jobs? · Latest report #kpxq99nm
Your job has an expiration date
December 17, 2027
In 14 monthsYou are just a glorified spreadsheet that occasionally answers emails.
Professional cell-formatter and PowerPoint slide deck architect.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Turning your pivot tables into permanent silence.
glub.youAI▸ DECISIONBOT V7.4▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 14 MONTHSAI's Special Power
filters noisy data into profitable lies
You clean messy data sets and build charts so managers can pretend they know what they are doing.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still lie to a client with a straight face during a presentation.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Automated scripts begin cleaning your messy CSV files overnight.
Month 4
AI agents replace your static dashboards with live predictive models.
Month 8
Natural language interfaces allow managers to skip asking you entirely.
Month 12
Language models write your slide deck summaries without your input.
Month 14 · D-Day
You are invited to a final meeting you cannot attend.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98.4%
4 cups
Coffee consumed per insights
99 percent
Pivot tables deleted
8 hours
Meetings about data
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to our basic graphing tool.
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