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Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Deputy Press Secretary jobs? · Latest report #rwgqqfdc
Your job has an expiration date
December 9, 2027
In 14 monthsYour spin is just predictive text with fewer guardrails.
Professional buffer between inconvenient truth and elected ego.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Neutralizing scandals at the speed of light.
split.you▸ SPINMACHINE 7000▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 14 MONTHSAI's Special Power
filters damaging headlines before print
You draft talking points, manage media inquiries, and monitor news cycles for elected officials. The goal is message control.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense exactly when a journalist is fishing for a leaked quote.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Sensors begin tracking every news mention for sentiment analysis.
Month 3
AI models generate your talking points before you even wake.
Month 7
Automated systems handle media requests with synthetic, calm voices.
Month 12
The official starts trusting the machine output over your advice.
Month 14 · D-Day
The press office is fully autonomous and perfectly message-aligned.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.8%
98 percent
Average spin density
0.3 seconds
Press release generation
Limitless
Scandal mitigation efficacy
Your severance
A one-year supply of unbranded, non-partisan coffee beans.
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