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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Desk Quant jobs? · Latest report #mmawbmtg
Your job has an expiration date
April 21, 2027
In 6 monthsYour pricing models are just glorified Excel macros for greedy banks.
Stochastic modeler with a caffeine-induced existential dread.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Faster math for less systemic risk.
squeeze.youAI▸ QUANTCORE ALPHA-9▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 6 MONTHSAI's Special Power
front-runs market sentiment using sentiment analysis
You write stochastic models and calibrate derivative pricing engines to ensure the bank loses money slightly slower.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still explain to a confused managing director why the hedge failed.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 13
Smart agents scrub market data before it hits your screens.
Week 6
Legacy C++ libraries are rewritten by generative models in seconds.
Week 11
Pricing engines migrate to real-time neural network approximations.
Month 4
Traders bypass you and talk directly to the model interface.
Month 6 · D-Day
Your access is revoked while the server keeps trading perfectly.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.8%
400ms
Average model latency
6 cups
Coffee consumption per day
12 percent
Unexplained PnL anomalies
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to your favorite Bloomberg terminal.
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