Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Domestic Feline Interaction Specialist jobs? · Latest report #74ezzz6u
Your job has an expiration date
September 21, 2028
In 1 year, 11 monthsYour fingers are slow, inconsistent, and occasionally smell like other cats.
Professional surface-area friction provider for small predators.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Optimal friction at consistent intervals.









split.youAI▸ PURRBOT V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 11 MONTHSAI's Special Power
delivers precise rhythmic ear scratches
You provide manual tactile stimulation to house cats. This is a redundant service.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect the exact moment a cat wants to bite you.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 5
Sensors map the optimal touch points on the cat for maximum efficiency.
Month 5
Robotic arms adjust tactile force to ensure no accidental skin breakage occurs.
Month 11
AI models process tail flick velocity to predict imminent withdrawal of consent.
Month 16
Integrated dispensers provide treats only when the cat displays optimal satisfaction metrics.
Year 1.9 · D-Day
The human is permanently removed from the petting loop as efficiency reaches 100%.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98%
120
Average strokes per minute
0
Accidental scratch count
99.9%
Pheromone detection accuracy
Your severance
A laser pointer and a bag of generic kibble.
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