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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace eCommerce Engineering Manager jobs? · Latest report #n8kuu2un
Your job has an expiration date
May 19, 2029
In 2 years, 7 monthsConverting your Jira tickets into a static site generator, one layoff later.
Professional cat-herder of full-stack engineers and Jira boards.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automated velocity for redundant backlogs.
bzzt.you▸ PIPELINEARCH V.4▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARS, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
executes the entire roadmap via prompt injection
Translates business requirements into technical sprints and manages engineering velocity. Orchestrates deployment pipelines while babysitting unstable microservices during peak seasonal traffic.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still explain why the production build broke at 3 a.m. to stakeholders.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
AI agents replace your manual code reviews by enforcing linting and architecture standards instantly.
Month 6
Large language models automatically generate ticket descriptions and assign story points based on historical velocity.
Month 15
Autonomous agents detect, isolate, and roll back failing deployments without human intervention during site outages.
Year 1.9
Predictive algorithms synthesize business goals into optimized technical roadmaps, rendering product managers and managers obsolete.
Year 2.6 · D-Day
The system fully subsumes the engineering management function, leaving you as a historical footnote.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95.2%
99.9%
Sprint Velocity Accuracy
0.04ms
Ticket Resolution Latency
100%
Meetings Eliminated
Your severance
One free subscription to a cloud compute service.
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