Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Engineering Aide jobs? · Latest report #kbj6syii
Your job has an expiration date
April 14, 2028
In 1 year, 6 monthsMoving Jira tickets to 'Done' is not a personality trait.
Professional gatekeeper of the engineering backlog.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Closing tickets before you even open them.
squeeze.you▸ JIRASENTINEL PRO▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 6 MONTHSAI's Special Power
autocreates jira subtasks in real time
You track engineering tasks and shuttle data between review boards. Automation will do this without the meetings.
The one thing AI can't do
You are the only person who actually knows where that one specific hardware file lives.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
An AI starts auto-categorizing your messy Jira backlog for you.
Month 4
The system automatically pushes tasks to stakeholders without your input.
Month 8
Machine learning writes the meeting minutes for engineering review boards.
Month 13
Compliance checks are handled by a script that never sleeps.
Month 18 · D-Day
You are invited to log off as the server takes over.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98%
42 daily
Average tickets moved
3 hours
Review board lag
Toxic
Coffee consumption rate
Your severance
A LinkedIn badge that says 'Expert Task Shuffler'.
Discussion
