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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Equity Investment Specialist jobs? · Latest report #a76eranw
Your job has an expiration date
October 21, 2028
In 2 yearsYou sell imaginary growth to people who already have too much cash.
Professional slide-jockey and expensive email forwarder.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automating the illusion of exclusivity
oof.youAI▸ CAPITALFLOW AI V9.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARSAI's Special Power
generates infinite bespoke pitch decks in seconds
You chase capital for funds and answer endless due diligence questions with fancy slides. Your job is basically professional begging.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still lie to a billionaire's face without your circuit board frying.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Smart software indexes all your documents to answer investor questions instantly.
Month 6
Large language models build perfect, persuasive decks without your human touch.
Month 12
Synthetic avatars handle routine diligence meetings while looking impressively focused.
Month 16
Algorithms refine IRR projections until investors stop asking annoying follow-up questions.
Year 2 · D-Day
The fund manager realizes the software is cheaper and less desperate.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95%
400
Slides built per month
12,000
Investor eye-rolls detected
0.04%
Truthfulness of pitch
Your severance
One free subscription to a premium stock ticker app.
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