Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Equity Research Sales jobs? · Latest report #a9a9a8gm
Your job has an expiration date
May 24, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsYour proprietary insights are just scraped data with a fancy haircut.
Professional lunch-buyer and PDF-delivery expert.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Data synthesis without the martini expense.
toast.youAI▸ MARKETFLOW ENGINE V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
sends personalized algorithmic trade alerts
You pitch research notes to institutional clients and manage trade flow. Your value is mostly expensive lunch-time chatter.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a portfolio manager is actually bored, not just busy.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Your research notes are fed into a large language model.
Month 4
Sensors monitor client engagement on every sent research email.
Month 8
The AI replaces your morning calls with personalized text notifications.
Month 13
Institutional clients prefer the bot's instant data-driven responses.
Month 19 · D-Day
The sales desk is repurposed as a server cooling room.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.4%
Excessive
Client lunch cost
Under 4 percent
Research read rate
Coin toss
Pitch accuracy
Your severance
A LinkedIn premium account and one final martini.
Discussion
