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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Esports Teacher jobs? · Latest report #epbuh3dn
Your job has an expiration date
May 24, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsTeaching teenagers to click faster is a hobby, not a career.
Professional screen-staring coach with a minor in tactical shouting.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Optimal macro-management at zero emotional cost
toast.youAI▸ COACHBOT META-ANALYST 4.0▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
enforces perfect cooldown rotation for every student
You review game VODs, manage scrimmage schedules, and pretend solo-queue rank correlates to professional team success.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still physically confiscate a controller when they refuse to stop flaming teammates.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
AI-driven vision software identifies and catalogs every positioning mistake in your students' saved match recordings.
Month 4
Adaptive algorithms generate real-time playbooks that render your manual strategic lectures completely redundant.
Month 8
Automated matchmaking systems coordinate cross-regional scrims without requiring your manual email outreach or manual scheduling.
Month 13
Biometric sensors and sentiment analysis detect player frustration before it impacts the win rate, bypassing your intervention.
Month 19 · D-Day
The system assumes full pedagogical control, leaving you to reminisce about the 'good old days' of gaming.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.7%
0.002ms
Average VOD analysis lag
99.9%
Student tilt prevention rate
Chronic
Human patience deficit
Your severance
One free lifetime subscription to a generic aim-trainer.
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