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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace EVP of Growth jobs? · Latest report #94svhz8m
Your job has an expiration date
December 16, 2027
In 14 monthsYou sell imaginary software efficiency to companies that are already drowning.
Professional power-pointer and quarterly quota panic-monger.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automated market domination without the expensive lunches.
toast.youAI▸ GROWTHENGINE V4.0▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 14 MONTHSAI's Special Power
optimizes lead funnels while you are sleeping
Oversees customer acquisition funnels, churn mitigation, and quarterly revenue targets. Manages complex SaaS sales cycles and scaling market penetration strategies.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still lie convincingly to investors during a failed Q3 earnings call.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Connects your existing CRM data to the machine for autonomous pipeline analysis.
Month 3
Generates market growth decks that are statistically more likely to secure funding.
Month 6
Replaces your micromanagement of AEs with real-time, data-driven sales guidance.
Month 9
Adjusts subscription tiers in real-time to maximize retention and revenue per user.
Month 14 · D-Day
The machine takes over your calendar, leaving you with no further purpose.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95.8%
42%
Pipeline churn percentage
$800
Cost per lead
99%
Buzzword density index
Your severance
A LinkedIn badge that says 'Open to Work'.
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