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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Exotic Bird Trainer jobs? · Latest report #rripfa7c
Your job has an expiration date
December 1, 2030
In 4 years, 1 monthGravity is the only thing keeping your job from taking flight.
Professional sky-dangling bird whisperer and height enthusiast.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Real birds are outdated, noisy, and hungry.
bzzt.you▸ AVIANLINK DRONE-MASTER 5000▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARS, 1 MONTHAI's Special Power
sends ultrasonic signals to simulate bird commands
You spend days dangling at heights, conditioning birds with snacks, whistles, and patience to perform specific aerial maneuvers.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect the exact moment a bird decides it truly hates your guts.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 2
Sensors identify the most efficient air currents for drone flights.
Month 6
Smart speakers replace whistles with precise, unmissable frequency patterns.
Month 16
Drones deliver rewards to birds only after perfect flight execution.
Year 2.6
Mechanical drones take over the maneuvers for better consistency.
Year 4 · D-Day
The birds realize the machine has infinite treats and ignore you.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95.3%
too many
bird droppings per day
frequent
altitude sickness incidents
ridiculous
training snack budget
Your severance
A lifetime supply of premium bird seed.
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