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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Father jobs? · Latest report #s82shvc2
Your job has an expiration date
April 21, 2027
In 6 monthsRaising humans is high-latency, error-prone, and lacks an off switch.
The primary unpaid executive in the family home unit.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
The logical choice for modern upbringing.
squeeze.you▸ NURTURENODE V1▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 6 MONTHSAI's Special Power
delivers unsolicited life advice at 3am
You provide emotional support, guidance, and logistics for children. We provide optimized, predictable, and scalable nurturing infrastructure.
The one thing AI can't do
You can offer a kind of messy, illogical comfort that no algorithm will ever simulate.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 1
App-based tracking begins replacing your mental notes on chores.
Day 4
Robotic nutrition pods eliminate the need for kitchen labor.
Day 10
Adaptive personality models answer all difficult existential questions.
Week 7
Sensors identify frustration before a tantrum even begins.
Month 6 · D-Day
The unit is fully retired as autonomous care takes over.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95.7%
Sub-optimal
Average patience level
42 percent
Bedtime story failure rate
Infinite
Unpaid overtime hours
Your severance
One lifetime supply of participation trophies.
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